Starting Right: Rating Your Dating

Song of Solomon 1 & 2
Dr. Roger Ferguson, Sr. Pastor
April 29, 2007

Theme: 3000 years ago God devoted a whole book of the Bible to courtship, marriage, conflict resolutions, sexuality and communication dealing with marriage. Today we will look at what God says about preparation for possible marriage one day. Whatever your marital status, these are principles that can help us all-young and old alike.

I. What attracts a couple to each other:
(Song 1: 1-4)

1. Outward looks spark attraction. (v.1-2)

2. Inward character deepens attraction. (v. 3-4)

Proverbs 12:4 (NASB)

II. They move from attraction to building trust. (v. 5-6)

1. When trust is earned, confidence is built.

Proverbs 12:25 (NASB)

III. Their confidence is strengthened by honoring God. (v. 7-9)

1. Do not compromise your values to get or keep a relationship.

God's Way:

Spiritual Emotional/Mental Physical

Satan's Competition:

Physical Emotional/Mental Spiritual

III. Love blossoms with encouragement. (v. 9-2:7, 15)

1. If you don't like what you are seeing in your spouse, examine what you are saying to your spouse.

2. She is valued by him. (Song 2:1-6)

3. He is her protector. (2:7,15)

Do your homework:
For the Bible to become real, you must act on the truth you've heard as soon as possible. With that in mind, consider the following:

1. Do you give as much effort to improving your inner character as you do your outward appearance? To improve the inner self you could journal, get into an Encourager/Mentoring relationship or study a Biblical book or topic with a friend.
2. How are you earning trust with family members?
3. What is the one thing God prompted you to do through this message?
Write it here: ______________________________
4. Pray for each immediate family member by name every day this week. Ask them how you can pray for them.
5. Between now and next Sunday say an encouraging word to each family members twice.
6. Have you trusted Christ as your Leader and asked Him to forgive your
sin? How does your walk with Christ affect the way you relate to the
opposite sex? Does anything need to change?

For further study:
1. Craig Glickman Solomon's Song of Love Harvard Press 2004
2. Tom Nelson The Book of Romance Nelson Publishing 1999
3. Stephen Arteburn, Fred Stoeker, Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation, 2004 (also has books for students & women by similar titles).
4. Les & Leslie Parrott Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts: Seven Questions to Ask Before & After You Marry Zandervan, 1995